Why People Need to Be a Little More Understanding

So there is this rumor going around about how breastfeeding makes you lose weight… I need to meet the person telling these lies. JK some women are truly blessed enough that the calories burned from nursing have them looking swimsuit ready.

Well unfortunately that’s not the story for all of us...AKA ME! I need to address this because I have personally been met with what I perceived as mean and judgmental comments about how I look postpartum considering I exclusively breastfeed. Not that anyone should never,ever, like absolutely never do that unless they say how wonderful you look,  but they do. So disclaimer I DID lose all my “baby weight” literally by 3 weeks postpartum I was back to my pre-baby weight, the only catch was that I was at my HIGHEST weight when I found out I was pregnant (a good +/-50lbs overweight). 

I mention all this to say that those first few weeks postpartum are basically soul shattering and hard AF but somehow beautiful. So while struggling to breastfeed my baby, the furthest thing from my mind was my weight. Like hello I just grew an entire human for 40 weeks (Yes EXACTLY 40 I gave birth on my due date) and then underwent major abdominal surgery and now I’m nursing a baby 24/7, plus it was the dead of Winter and I could hide everything in leggings and nursing tank tops.  So as the snow melted away, Spring came around and I basically re-entered society as a new mom and HELLA proud because I continued to exclusively nurse, people we won’t say who (they know who they are) asked if I was still nursing and what I was eating because I was still holding on to weight. When in actuality I was holding on to the same weight I had before Jacob was born. 

Not caring to explain the numbers I said “My focus is on nourishing my baby and I have all the time to get myself where I need to be weight and health wise.” Sounds like a great answer right? Well it was but it was eating away at me, and Instagram does NOTHING to make you feel better about yourself, especially with Summer around the corner. So despite eating “clean” and chugging water which I do anyway since nursing makes me thirsty as if I’ve been stuck in the Sahara. My body basically yelled at me for being in a caloric deficit which is needed to lose weight. Had I been smart I would’ve just followed the pregnant and breastfeeding meal plan with Herbalife from the start.

So right then and there I had to make a decision to let my supply suffer and all these months of hard work of exclusively nursing my son basically go down the drain to lose that weight I’ve wanted to lose since the year before or make the sacrifice to focus on my supply and reach my goal of EBF for 6 months which was right around the corner. 

It took tea, brownies, protein bars, middle of the night pumping and back to eating more calories to get my supply back up to par. It was bittersweet I was ecstatic to get my supply back and continue my journey but what did that mean for me? I wouldn’t get to post a 6months in vs out pic showing off a svelte waist (because this is soooo important, DUH!) Would my old Summer clothes fit? Would I feel happy with my new postpartum body which I am still adjusting to?

I had my A-HA! moment and was happy with the choice I made, my weight-loss journey would be a long and basically never ending one, because maintaining is just as much work. Feeding my son from my body for the 1st year of his life has a timestamp on it and I had to choose to prioritize it. Now the other side of the coin is can I eat cleaner? Of Course I can. Can I be more active and try and burn more calories if I can’t cut back on consuming them? Well DUH!

My takeaway is unless you are complimenting a new mom, which is the only acceptable comment that should ever be made to them, then keep your mouth SHUT, ZIP IT, SHH!  This is not to say that keeping a healthy weight isn’t a priority or to minimize the long term and adverse effects of being overweight, but to speak to the importance of  having compassion and understanding towards a new mother. Mentioning how Susie fit back into her size 4 jeans 1 month postpartum is absolutely irrelevant and truly unkind, but good for you Susie. My son will not breastfeed forever this is a very small time in the grand scheme of things and yes I would love to look better in some summer outfits. I am human but it means a hell of a lot more to me to say I successfully nursed my son. 

-Pris 

“The natural power of breastfeeding is one of the greatest wonders of the world. It is about real love. It is about caring and celebrating the wondrous joy of nurturing a new life. It is about enjoying being a woman”

- Anwar Fazal